Step One: It starts with confidence.

I've packed my proverbial bags and set my metaphorical step,

and the first mile marker on this journey around the world (of self-discovery) is Step One: Confidence.



It takes a lot of faith to do things. I generalize the term: "things," because each person is different. For me: going to a crowded party and interacting with the huge group bit by bit in those awkward little 3 minute conversations with typical forced laughter at the unwieldy jokes and queer mannerisms and eating the weird snacks that the host has chosen as some cheap attempt at high-browed culture...THAT takes confidence. For others, that'd be easy, and even fun.



I've decided: I have confidence that things will be alright if I do something which scares me. So, I'm trying to do "things" which scare me. And it begins by trying. I have confidence that if I try one little adventure in vulnerability, I'll be okay. And to add to that statement, I have hope that if I keep trying I'll find out wonderful things and grow as a person.

...



The Future (of unknowns). I don't know where I'm going. (I guess, this blog won't actually talk about my growth in confidence, but it'll begin by telling you about the lack of. I apologize for impeding your closure-hungry hearts, and prattling on about this pre-topic: topic.)

---I have often heard it said that Men should have a plan. I've heard Preachers telling women to: "stay away from indecisive Men." ...People that spread and purvey advise like that scare me.

...Because I don't know where I am going. Not that I don't have a plan...It's just that, were I to be ask my plan, I'd answer, "I'm working a part time job and enjoying life, and I feel like that's where God wants me right now, so I'm going to keep doing it and wait to see what He has for my future." And that, my friends, doesn't sound like much of a plan at all. In fact, if you boil it down, my plan is to wait for God to tell me His plan. HA! That sounds much better when I put it that way...It seems to convey a sense of spiritual security and confidence...
(which is what I'm going for!)

So...I'll end with a question, "What will it take for you to move forward with your future?"

let the pondering begin...